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Sunday, June 5, 2011

Oh, Frenchie!

FRENCHIE (fren-CHEE) noun - Me, Peggy, and Boomie's code name for secret crush.

My life is more hectic now than ever!
So much that I hate to admit that I've completely forgot about this blog thingy.
Any who,
Peggy was a little bitch at work all day yesterday. When she's in one of her moods, it's so much fun to pick on her. I told her she was bitchy because she needs to get laid, which she denied even though it's been a whole month since she got any. She insisted on calling me a whore because I said going a whole month without sex is too long and 2 weeks is pushing it... sue me! Sometimes I forget that she's only 19; that being said, we are on two different levels.
Peggy finally got BabyDaddy's (who I've re-nicknamed ButterBall) number. He texts her all the time; now she's annoyed to the point where she wants nothing to do with him anymore. Instead of asking for advice on how to get him, now that she has him, she wants advice on how to get rid of him. Again, I have to keep in mind that she's still a teenager and has lots to learn.

Peggy: "So, after we got done making out... he told me he's scared of you."
Me: "Why?"
Peggy: "He said you're always yelling on the dock, and on top of that you're so tall."
Me: "But he's fat..."
Peggy: "Shut up! ..."
Me: "He's like a little butter ball; short and fat. And he has more titties than you."
Peggy: "He does not!"
Me: "Man boobs."

Like Peggy, I have my new "creep" as well. I'm going to call him WellHung, because he is indeed that, WELL HUNG. He has my definition of the perfect dick. Big, thick, and slightly bent. On top of that, he knows what to do with it. He knows what he wants and how he wants it, while giving me what I want at the same time. When he came over the other night, he wasted no time taking what was his. I have a weakness for men who take control in bed... but lets me control everything else. I just might marry him. End of story!

Peggy: "Does your frenchie have man boobs?"
Me: "I highly doubt it! Have you seen his arm muscles?! Muscles like that don't come with man boobs."
Peggy: "If ButterBall has man titties, I'm done."