Juneaux! Can I Have Your Autograph?!

I can't help but feel like a Post Office Celebrity.
I hate to toot my own horn, but I'm so loved there. TOOT TOOT! Sometimes though, I'm so loved that I start to feel violated. Today for example, I caught two "clowns" completely eye-fucking me. The first goof ball I see everyday, and he stares at me every chance he gets. Today I asked him a question about the superbowl and he started stuttering as if he couldn't believe I was talking to him.
The second guy, I've never seen him before until today since he works the graveyard shift. I noticed him noticing me from a distance. He approached me and tried to make "small talk", but I kept my answers short and to the point. When l was hugging THEEbooh, I caught him glancing over out of the corner of his eye.

I hate that I sound so stuck-up, cocky, conceited, and arrogant in this post. It is what it is though.
Gotta love me!