Well, I'm starting off November with a terrible cold.
I feel like shit.
I look like shit.
The whole nine.
Sneezing every 5 seconds and coughing every 10 seconds.
Stuffy nose, watery eyes, runny nose... I feel like I have a giant booger in my throat. Ugh! Kill me now!
I love my work Bestie... who a call "Bestie". He's the rudest, most ignorant, disrespectful mother fucker on the planet! Which is why I like him.
Juneaux: "So, how's the new worker?"
Bestie: "I didn't even pay them any attention."
Juneaux: "I mean, is he a hard worker?"
Bestie: "I don't know. Why?"
Juneaux: "Because... I wanna fuck him!"
Bestie: "Hahaha... what's does that have to do with anything?!"
Juneaux: "Because if he's a hard worker, he might be a HARD WORKER." (pelvic thrust)
Bestie: "Hahahaha... you're out of control!"
Him: "Do you want to watch Hardcore Pawn?"
Juneaux: "Yeah."
(Juneaux comes out of the kitchen and looks at the tv)
Juneaux: "What the fuck?! This don't look like no hardcore porn!"
Him: "I said Hardcore PAWN!"
Juneaux: *dissapointed face* o_o "Kill yo self."
I've notice that I no longer have a poker face.
I tend to wear my feelings on my sleeve. If I'm mad, everyone can look at me and tell. If I'm happy, it's so obvious. Same thing when I'm annoyed, frustrated, and excited. If I don't like somebody, I can't put on a fake smile and pretend I do. I just can't! My face expressions can be read like a book. Most times, I can just look at someone and they know exactly what's on my mind because my face says it all.
On top of that, I can know/be around somebody for 5 minutes and decided whether I like them or not. 9 times out of 10, my vibes be correct. I hate feeling like I'm such a judgemental person, but I'm really not. I give everybody a fair chance, but if I have a bad vibe about you... then you got to go! My aunt taught me to always trust my first instinct.
I'm not the best person when it comes to relationship advice. Like I said before, I'm a player, and players don't do relationships for real. At the same time though, I know a player when I see one as if they're walking around with the word "PLAYER" written across their forehead.
I hate when I know when one of my friend's boyfriends are cheating on them. I don't know if it's my place to tell them or not. Normally I just wait for them to ask for my opinion, but I don't like to see them played or hurt. At the same time, no one likes to hear anything like that coming from their friend. I'm not really going to get into details right now because I don't have the time. But here's a little note:
If your man isn't puttin it down in YOUR bedroom, then he's DEFINITELY puttin it down in someone else's bedroom. There's no man on the face of this planet who don't like sex! If that's his excuse, he's fuckin someone else! The truth hurts, and so does being in denial!
The world would be such a better place if people would just live and let live. I don't give a flying fuck what people do as long as it don't effect me in a negative way. Go screw a moose for all I care... if that's what you do, then who the hell am I or anyone for that matter, to tell you No?
If you're gay, be gay! Just don't hit on me or try no crazy shit with me. If wearing purple and pink weave is your thing, knock yourself out! If you raise your kids not to believe in Santa Claus, fine; just don't ruin Santa for someone else's kids!
People spend way too much time worrying about others and what they do in their personal lives. As long as someone isn't hurting someone else, let them live their lives the way they want to live it, because you wouldn't want someone trying to tell you how you should live yours! Period.
In other words: Mind your fucking business! I'm Just sayin!
So, for all those inquiring minds out there... My name is Juneaux, and I'm 50% Creole of Color, 25% African American, and 25% Irish. Hello world :)
Today (technically yesterday) was quite interesting if I do say so myself.
I got laid in a public place. It was too fun. I'm too tired to get into details, but I can't wait for round two lol. On another note, I just ordered my iPhone 4s.
Sprint + iPhone + Post Office Discount = Satisfied Juneaux.
#ThatWillBeAll
Toodles!
First of all, Happy October everyone!
I'm glad autumn is here. Fall and winter is my favorite time of the year! It was pretty darn rainy and cold these last few days in Pittsburgh; it made me realize that summer is really GONE.
Anyways, I'm kicking off the new month with fantastic news: My lil sister Bold&Flirty is having a baby :) I can't wait until my niece Harper Adelle-Leslie Lowry, or my nephew Quentin Leslie Lowry get here! He/she is going to be mad spoiled.
Also, I've been asked to be a supervisor at work because I'm a bully. I don't know if I should be offended or honored lol. Whatever. I'm just so excited about these new changes in my life!
Well, I'm calling it short tonight.
Work at 12:30pm (which is 9am in "Juneaux Time Zone"; everyone knows how I despise mornings.) and the steelers game, whoop whoop!
The other day, I wrote a post titled "Ladies Is Pimps
Why do people insist on bragging about how much they smoke and/or drink?
Congradu-FUCKING-lations! (my sarcasm voice). I'm normally a firm believer of live and let live, but bragging about being drunk and high all day ain't cute whatsoever! How about taking that energy and getting a job or doing something positive?
I'm just saying.
- I'm in a great mood right now.
- Well, first of all, Home Alone 2 is on! This movie always get me in the Christmas spirit, no matter what time of the year it is.
- I had a blast at work today in building #2. My coworkers had me crackin up all day. I'm so mad I'm going back to building #1 tomorrow :( I'm going to miss working with them. Shoutout to Boomie, HotCheetos, Gryffindore, DeliMeat, and GirlVSfood! Love them!
Ughh.
Sometimes I wish I weren't so loud-n-obnoxious. Why can't I just sit down and shut the fuck up for once? I wish I wasn't so damn sarcastic all the time too. I really just need to learn to shut up. I know I can't change, that's just part of who I am, and if people can't accept that then they can hit the road... but shit, I get on my own nerves sometimes man. I got "saying the wrong thing at the wrong time" down to a science." Smh!
SN: Thanks for the advice F. Baby! <--- I love that ninja.
And my ninja ILLBill too; don't know what I would do without their wisdom.
Quote Of The Day [yesterday] "Get rid of the dead weight; It's pointless."
I gotta cut this short, work tomorrow. Great.
I stopped believing in relationships a while ago.
I like to have a variety of men to choose from because I'm picky, and 9 times out of 10, I would never find my perfect man because these bums could never meet my standards.
Naw, I'm not a whore, slut, hoe, or whatever you want to call it; I don't bang anything with a dick...
... but if I see something I like, I keep it real.
No shame in my game :)
#HavingMyCakeAndEatingItToo
#Winning
So, I've been diagnosed with Trigaminal Neuralgia (TN) also called "The Suicide Disease", this morning at the Emergency Room. I'm so relieved to finally be getting answers on why I've been having sharp, shooting, teeth, ear, and head pain since last November. I can't wait to schedule an emergency appointment with a Nuerologist tomorrow so he/she can get to the bottom of this. I need help NOW. The pain is unbearable; I've never felt such pain in my life. People who have never had it would say or think that people with it are being dramatic, but they don't call it the Suicide Disease for no reason: There is no cure, so the only way out for the people who don't respond to treatment is to take their own lives. It's sad, I know, but yes, the pain is really THAT bad. Google it.
tri·gem·i·nal neu·ral·gia
noun
|
Boomie: "When you turned around, your boobs hit me in my back!"
Peggy: "Did you just say I tea-bagged your back?!"
Boomie: (laughs) "No! I didn't say that. I said..."
Peggy: "Juneaux, I just tea-bagged Boomie's back!... with my boobs."
These girls crack me up. I don't know how I would get through the work day without them.
FRENCHIE (fren-CHEE) noun - Me, Peggy, and Boomie's code name for secret crush.
My life is more hectic now than ever!
So much that I hate to admit that I've completely forgot about this blog thingy.
Any who,
Peggy was a little bitch at work all day yesterday. When she's in one of her moods, it's so much fun to pick on her. I told her she was bitchy because she needs to get laid, which she denied even though it's been a whole month since she got any. She insisted on calling me a whore because I said going a whole month without sex is too long and 2 weeks is pushing it... sue me! Sometimes I forget that she's only 19; that being said, we are on two different levels.
Peggy finally got BabyDaddy's (who I've re-nicknamed ButterBall) number. He texts her all the time; now she's annoyed to the point where she wants nothing to do with him anymore. Instead of asking for advice on how to get him, now that she has him, she wants advice on how to get rid of him. Again, I have to keep in mind that she's still a teenager and has lots to learn.
Peggy: "So, after we got done making out... he told me he's scared of you."
Me: "Why?"
Peggy: "He said you're always yelling on the dock, and on top of that you're so tall."
Me: "But he's fat..."
Peggy: "Shut up! ..."
Me: "He's like a little butter ball; short and fat. And he has more titties than you."
Peggy: "He does not!"
Me: "Man boobs."
Like Peggy, I have my new "creep" as well. I'm going to call him WellHung, because he is indeed that, WELL HUNG. He has my definition of the perfect dick. Big, thick, and slightly bent. On top of that, he knows what to do with it. He knows what he wants and how he wants it, while giving me what I want at the same time. When he came over the other night, he wasted no time taking what was his. I have a weakness for men who take control in bed... but lets me control everything else. I just might marry him. End of story!
Peggy: "Does your frenchie have man boobs?"
Me: "I highly doubt it! Have you seen his arm muscles?! Muscles like that don't come with man boobs."
Peggy: "If ButterBall has man titties, I'm done."
I'm a Harry Potter Movie geek.
I just got done watching "Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Pt. 1" just now for the first time. Okay, so I guess that doesn't exactly qualify me as a geek because I would have went to the theater to see it the second it aired if I were, but I do indeed love the Harry Potter movies and couldn't wait for Deathly Hallows to be available on onDemand. Just like the previous Harry Potter films, this one was great. I, however, have never read a Harry Potter book, so I can't compare the two. Being the silly person I am, I thought the movie was humerous as well as thrilling and suspenseful. I laughed probably a lot more than everyone else who've seen it. That's just me. The end of the movie made me so anxious to see Deathly Hallows Pt 2, which I definitely will go to the theater to see. Matter of fact, I'm counting down the days to it's release date in July. Unlike the people who have read the books, I don't know what happens after Voldy gets the Elder Wand... and please, please don't spoil it for me.
On another note, there's so much on my agenda tomorrow, but so little time. I have to wake up, hit up Walmart and Kmart, go to Taco Bell, go to the bank, be to work at 4:30pm, leave work at 6:30pm, go to my lil' cousin's skating party at 7pm, and clock back into work at 9:00pm. I'll probably get off around 10:30 to 11:00pm; I'm probably going to come home and watch Deathly Hallows Pt.1 again, just to make sure I didn't miss anything the first time.
It's now 3:21am.
If I want to get everything done, I better go to sleep :)
That being said, good night world.
I'm pissed.
Last week my landlord's secretary called me and said they never received March's rent. The first thing I do when I get paid at the end of the month is go to my job and buy a money order for $425 to pay my rent. Since I work at the post office, I cancel my mail with my own two hands and send it on it's way to prevent it from being lost. So one of two things happened:
A) The mail carrier put it in the wrong mailbox.
B) The secretary is lying and trying to scam me.
I never had a problem with his secretary and she is very nice, so I know that it's "A".
Since I can't find the receipt to my money order, they have no way to track it, and therefore no proof that I mailed it. I told them that I have it on my bank statement but she said that's not enough evidence.
I have to repay the $425 and to do so I had to drop my summer class so I can get a refund to pay this rent again. $850 out the window over something that's not my fault. Because of this, I can't even go to school. I work hard to pay all my bills on time. I've never been late on anything...cable, gas, electric, rent, school, nothing. Everything I work hard for is falling apart. I know some will say "It's not the end of the world." But when you're a college student, living on your own, working hard to keep your bills paid on time, it is.
So my question is: Does hard work really pay off?
Of course is does, just not for me. Fuck my life.
Today (technically yesterday since it's 1am) was one of the best off days I had in a long time :)
I got to relax and enjoy some "me time" while watching Law & Order: SVU.
Then my two younger sisters, Bold&Flirty, age 21, and BubblyOne, age 20, came over to join me and cook some dinner. Fried boneless chicken breast, Bush's Grillin' Beans, and that cheesy broccoli rice stuff, yum!
I can't remember if that was before or after Bold&Flirty tried to steal my Marie Callender's Pot Pie. She put it under her shirt, which made her look like she was pregnant with Spongebob Squarepants. It was so funny. There is never a dull moment when these two clowns are around!
Then later my almost 2 year old step-niece came over for a little while. She's so adorable and brilliant!
On top of that, BubblyOne organized my closet for me, therefore I'm going to bed with a smile on my face, knowing my house is spotless. A clean house is a happy house! I just pray this good mood roll into Monday, but I know someone is going to say or do something so asshole'ish that I'm going to be forced to change this post into an obituary.
*fingers crossed*
Phoniness is a terrible characteristic.
Especially towards me because I'm going to call you out on it, whether you like it or not. If I don't like a person, they will know it, because I'm going to avoid them as much as possible and I damn sure won't smile in their face. Some people will consider this being a "bitch", but I call it simply being honest.
Honest with my feelings and honest with the person on my "shit list".
I feel if a person don't like me for whatever reason, they should just keep it moving. Please don't smile in my face and pretend to be my best friend, then turn around and talk about me to the next person. I have so much more respect for people who are true to themselves and their own feelings, even if those feelings are against me, because I agree that I'm not the most likable person and could be a pain to get along with.
It's hard separating the "real" from the "fake".
Atleast, for me it is.
I wish personality traits were literally written on a person's forehead:
-Liar
-Trustworthy
-Honest
-Responsible
-Friendly
-Asshole
It would save me a lot of time, heart breaks, and disappointments. One thing I've learned about myself these pass few years is that I put my trust in people too soon. There's nothing more heart wrecking than finding out someone you trust with your life could go above and beyond to hurt you, let you down, and/or abandon you. Especially if you don't deserve it.
There's nothing more hurtful than someone who you thought knew you so well, turns out to not know you at all and vice versa.
On another note:
As open hearted as I am, I'm not a very forgiving person; I hold grudges for life. One strike, you're out. The second you betray me is the second I start to stare right through you. I don't believe in second and third chances. I'm a firm believer that 'once an asshole, always an asshole", and I refuse to let anyone make a fool of me... twice.
All that being said, it's time to start cutting some people out of my life. If you're not on #TeamJuneaux, then "youz a non motha fuckin' factor, bitch." (Evelyn's voice, Basketball Wives)
I've always had bad luck with phones. Always.
A few weeks after I replaced my 1st Evo with a brand new one back in February, I broke it.
This time much worse than the last time.
I've came to the conclusion that I don't have bad luck.
I AM bad luck.
When there's a one in a ten chance of something... I'm always that one person.
When there's a one in a million chance... that's me.
One in a billion... me.
At first, I couldn't take it. Now, this is what I consider "normal."
Something bad happening to me is now part of my daily routine. I actually look forward to seeing what "kill joy" awaits me.
Surprisingly, today was free of bad luck. I kept waiting for something to happen, but nothing did.
Today was actually filled with lots of laughter. Days like this remind me how much I love my co-workers. Peggy and I came up with a game called "Post Office Musical"... we sang everything we said as if we were on "High School Musical". It was hilarious and people were getting annoyed, which made it even more comical.
My boy Vick is another interesting character on the job. We call him "Vick" because he kind of resemble Mike Vick the QB. Personality wise, he's the coolest cat I know. He's so laid back and down the earth, but funny and rude. We spend most of our work day arguing jokingly. We drive each other up the wall, and I go out of my way to annoy him. He's like the big brother I never had.
Recently I found out he's kind of scared of being popped with rubberbands.
*approaches Vick, aiming to shoot him with a rubberband.*
Me: "This is a stick up!"
Vick: (covers face) "Fuck out of here with that, man!"
Me: (still aiming rubberband) "Give me your frooties!"
Vick: (empties out his pockets) "Here!"
Me: "Thanks." (eats frooties)
THEEbooh: (laughs) Vick, you just got bullied out of your candy!
Sunday, me and 9 other family members went out to eat at Golden Corral.
For some reason the ice cream machine was making the chocolate ice cream ooze out like big long turds. Everyone in the restaurant had what looked like bowls of dookie, that was hilarious.
Once they got the vanilla flavor up and running, my 10 year old little cousin, Sassy, was quick to jump up to make her an ice cream cone.
There are people who can live their life not knowing what's going on around them, or not care what's going on around them.
Then, there are people like me:
- Always on a need-to-know basis.
- Can't go two minutes without asking "who?", "where?", "why?", "when?", and "how?".
- Lives to eavesdrop.
I'm always being accused of being nebby [that's Pittsburghese, meaning nosy]. Everyone accuses me, and I shamelessly plead guilty.
Being nebby is one of those personality traits that one can't help. You're either naturally nebby, or not at all.
THEEbooh hates that I'm nebby, and when he catches me in action, he tries to put me in check. Little does he know, eavesdropping has become a sport, and I'm the champion. I can look totally busy, but really be all up in the bees-wax.
That being said: I know more about people than they give me credit for.
Keeping secrets is a whole nother issue.
I'm working on it.
I did a lot of tongue biting today, because I was trying my best to be quiet-n-pleasant. It didn't work out so well though. People seem to assume that when I'm quiet, for once, that I'm angry. Believe it or not, there are times, occassionally, when blabber-mouth Juneaux has nothing to say.
Tomorrow is another day though.
Tomorrow I go back to being my loud-n-obnoxious self.
Tomorrow, I go back to hurting feelings and breaking hearts.
Tomorrow, if people get in my way, they WILL get stepped on, if not, ran over.
As much as I enjoy quiet time here and there, when I'm not yelling across the room, I'm bored. When I'm not being an asshole or pushing people's buttons, I'm bored! And today was exactly that, BO-RING!
*Random Conversation*
Peggy: "Oh my God, Juneaux, I joined the gym today. You should see the guys; they look amazing."
Me: "They look better than your truck driver 'baby daddy'?"
Peggy: "Hell yeah! These guys make truck drivers look like truck drivers."
Me: (laughs)
*Next Day*
Me: "So how's the gym? Did you meet your future hubby yet?"
Peggy: "No. Them guys are too into their bodies."
The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.
My name is Juneaux... (Hi Juneaux!) and I'm addicted to:
- HTC Evo
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Online Shopping
- 7Eleven Slurpees
- Orange Juice [Pulp Free]
It's 2:45 a.m. and I'm up on my Evo, tweetin' and facebook'... just ordered some shoes and a Valentine's Day gift, that's the online shopping part. Only If this phone had a slurpee and orange juice maker... is there an app for THAT?
I can't help but feel like a Post Office Celebrity.
I hate to toot my own horn, but I'm so loved there. TOOT TOOT! Sometimes though, I'm so loved that I start to feel violated. Today for example, I caught two "clowns" completely eye-fucking me. The first goof ball I see everyday, and he stares at me every chance he gets. Today I asked him a question about the superbowl and he started stuttering as if he couldn't believe I was talking to him.
The second guy, I've never seen him before until today since he works the graveyard shift. I noticed him noticing me from a distance. He approached me and tried to make "small talk", but I kept my answers short and to the point. When l was hugging THEEbooh, I caught him glancing over out of the corner of his eye.
I hate that I sound so stuck-up, cocky, conceited, and arrogant in this post. It is what it is though.
Gotta love me!
I love my HTC Evo. The battery life sucks, but it's big and doubles as my computer. Until recently, I thought this phone was damn near indestructible. A week or two after I got my phone, I was at work running down the stairs. My phone slipped out my pocket, fell through the crack of the stairs, down two flights. Not a crack, not a scratch, not even a scuff mark.
About two weeks ago, I was laying in bed with my Evo, [Don't judge me; I love my phone.] and THEEbooh was trying to be nasty and climb on top of me. He didn't see my phone, went to move the covers, and the phone fell off the bed onto the hardwood floors.
RESULTS:
It's not everyday you come across a 6'1 female. Even though I get tired of answering the same ol' questions about my height on a daily basis, I smile, give them my answer, and keeps it moving. Most, if not all the people that approach me, admires my height. They tell me how beautiful I am and how they wish they were tall. Still, it gets old after a while.
Sure, being tall is amazing. When you're tall, you automatically stand out and grab everyone's attention. You never need a pedistol, and people feel like they need to go out of THEIR way to impress YOU. I "wow" all the men, and people assume I'm trustworthy. Bosses see me as a leader and always depend on me the most. I love it.
I rarely think about my height any more; except when I'm curled up like a pretzel on a plane, and buying jeans. Other than that, everyday I grow to love it more and more.
Bystander: "You're tall."
Me: "Thank You."
Bystander: "You're beautiful too."
Me: "Thank You."
Bystander: "You should be a model."
Me: "You're like a hallmark card that won't quit."
Bystander: "I'm just sayin..."
The way I ate today, I can't help but feel like the ultimate pig. Sadly, I feel no guilt. I already got plans on ordering a cheese steak hoagie on my lunch tomorrow. I can't wait. *fist pump*
CutThroat: "Let's go to the hot dog shop. I got a taste for a chili dog."
Me: "Let's go then."
CutThroat: " Oooo!! Or Eggrolls..."
Me: "Yeah, eggrolls. I got to go that way anyway to get some hair scissors."
*walking; 10 minutes later.*
Me: "Forget the scissors, let's go get them eggrolls."
Ever since I've started working at the Post Office 9 months ago, I've been living there. I'm there so much that my social and personal life has taken the complete back burner. Working there, I've came across, met, and even befriended some interesting people.
One unusual character is 19 year old "Peggy Bundy". Peggy has bright red hair with pale white skin and blue eyes. She's simple, fun, lacks common sense, and for the most part, a total anema at times.
Her laid back, gentle personality tends to bump heads with THEEbooh's personality, so they always end up with the most random conversations that goes something like this:
THEEbooh: "In high school, did they like you for your tits or ass?"
Peggy: "I don't know. Why?"
THEEbooh: "Because I'm going to put you on the corner and make some money off of you."
Peggy: "How about I put YOU on the corner; I'll make you up."
Me: (laughing)
THEEbooh: "I don't need made up, all I got to do is whip out my cock!"
Me: (cracking up) "True."
Peggy has a crush on one of the truck drivers who she calls her "baby daddy", behind his back. For weeks I've been trying to encourage her to talk to him and feel him out, or atleast find out his real name and age. Lately, I got tired of hearing her dream out loud and in my ear about this man, so I told her if she doesn't break the ice by Saturday that I was going to butt-in and play Cupid, or atleast get the inside scoop on him.
While I was loading the Priority Mail Truck, she came in and punched me on the arm.
Peggy: "Oh my God, Juneaux, I am so mad!"
Me: "Why? What's wrong?!"
Peggy: "He's 33 with a 15 year old son!"
Me: (laughing)
Peggy: "He said he thought I was atleast 23, and he called me a youngin!"
Even after finding out BabyDaddy is 14 years older than her, with a son too old to be her step-son, she's still interested. I told Peggy he's too old and the chances of them working out is slim to none because he's comparing her to his 15 year old son. He still sees her as a child and therefore needs a grown woman in his life. That's assuming he's unmarried.
Peggy: "You think he's too old to just hang out for a couple days with?"
Me: "Where ya'll going to go? Chuck E. Cheese?"
Peggy: "It's official, I hate you."
Me: (giggles)
After all that, I can't help but to feel like a total cock-block. I mean, who the hell am I to tell her no?
"loudNobnoxious: i would miss me too if i were them; cuz i'm AWESOME. #yeahisaidit, i'm FUCKIN awesome. unfortunately for them, when i break, i break."
That was my tweet from last night. Suddenly, 3 of my last 4 exes have been trying to get back with me, but my heart is already in the process of being taken again; so they're basically shit out of luck. It cracks me up that a man don't realize how good of a girlfriend I am until I'm loving someone else. I'm not saying I'm the perfect girl... I can't cook, I'm clumsy, and I seem to say the wrong things at the wrong time. But! But, I am independent, faithful, and a "rider". If I'm putting in 100% and he's only putting in 50%, he's getting kicked to the curb. I'm a firm believer that in every relationship, each person have to bend a little. Bend too much, you'll break... don't bend at all, then you're not compromising. Also, it's amazing what a little communication can do; I learned that the other day. All that being said: I'm no longer accepting boyfriend applications.
